


Finding Home

by manuhale13



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Demisexual Castiel, Fluff and Smut, Happy Ending, High School, Jock Dean, M/M, Pining, Shy Castiel, Socially Awkward Castiel, Underage Kissing, Underage Sex, Underage Smoking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-15
Updated: 2015-01-27
Packaged: 2018-02-21 06:49:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2458787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manuhale13/pseuds/manuhale13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is shy, socially awkward while Dean is jock. Cas falls for him and pines over the years. I'm not good at summaries, sorry.<br/>On hiatus</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Destiel fic. English is not my first language so pardon me for all the upcoming spelling and grammatical errors and typos. I'm not good at putting warnings and forget most of the time so try to keep up with that, although there won't be any severe triggers. There might be minor-angst. The updates might not be regular. Still I'll try my best. Also I've changed Lucifer's name to Lucius. The character is the same, just a little change in name. Try to overlook that. Constructive criticism is welcome, hateful comments! Not at all! I'll stop now, hope you enjoy. This is book should NOT be posted else where.

Castiel had recently moved to Kansas with his brothers. He was twelve years old. He had three older brothers- Michael, Lucius, and Gabriel. His father left them when he was seven. His mother died shorty after that. Since then, Michael has been taking care of them. He completed his graduation shortly after their father left them. He was good at studies, so he got a job soon. He made sure they had a roof above their heads, kept them fed, and made sure they got good education. But he was also very strict. He cared for his brothers but also made sure they were in line. Although that had not worked well with Lucius. He had black hair and blue eyes, like their father. And a calm and authoritative personality. He got a promotion hence they had to move to Kansas.

His second brother Lucius was the physical manifestation of the word "rebel". He dropped out of college. Never gave a second thought to studies. He was mostly clad in ripped denims and tees, mainly in black. He rarely spent his time home. When he came home, most of the time he brought a girl or a guy with him. His bike was the only thing he seemed to care about. He had probably tried every type of drug. He worked at bars sometimes. Rarely sticking around same bar for more than a few months. He fought with Michael on a regular basis. He loved his brothers but he changed when their father left. He loved their father too much. He felt betrayed when he left. That was the reason he did what he did. This was his way of coping. He had blue eyes like Michael but had dirty blonde hair like their mother.

Gabriel, his third brother was still in high school. He reminded Castiel of their mother. He had honey colored eyes like their mother and bronze hair. He was rather playfull and easy going. But he hated it when his brothers fought. He had a part time job in a nearby cafe. His mouth was mostly stuffed with chocolates and candies. Sweets were his weakness. You could get him to do anything by bribing him with sweets. Castiel didn't like it when he pulled pranks on him. Still, Gabe was four years older and there wasn't anything he could do about it.

Coming back to Castiel, he was twelve years old. He was good at studies but was miserable when it came to sports or dancing or anything such as that. He was usually very shy and nervous around new people. He was epitome of social awkwardness. He never knew how to start a conversation with someone. Sometimes when he tried, he often ended up saying something wrong because of his naive nature. He was upfront and straight forward, that was mistaken as him being rude most of the times. His only hobby was reading books. He was a total bookworm and could read all day and all night long. His books were his friends. They didn't judge him for being different. They helped him escape to different world and places. They introduced him to different characters and he found them more interesting than real life people. He had read the Grimm fairytales five times now. But what presently occupied his brain was the thought of new school.

He never had any close friends. He will not be missing any. But moving to a new school and getting settled there made him groan inwardly.

Today was the first day at school and he had over slept. He couldn't sleep last night thinking about his new school. Now he was practically running through the corridoors clutching some books in his hands. He was trying not to be late at the very first day and suddenly he collided with a guy who was just turning around. He fell down and his books scattered. Thankfully the guy did not fall.  
  
"Hey dude! You okay?"  
  
Wincing slightly he looked up and froze. Staring down at him were a pair of concerned green eyes with shimmers of gold. Only one thought came to his mind. "Home".


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pining starts from Cas' side. There will be Cas' journal entries from now on. Also there will be a name for his journal because. Hope you enjoy.

"Hey! You okay there?"  
  
Cas heard him as soon as he snapped out of his thought process. He blushed from embarrassment. This was his first day at school. He hastily got up and muttered yeah. He looked at the breathtaking stranger again. He was looking at his eyes. This made Cas fidget awkwardly. His eyes were way too striking for his liking. He wished he had sky blue ones like Michael or Lucius or golden ones like Gabriel that reminded him of his mother. Instead he had electric blue eyes that he swore looked like LED bulbs sometimes. His fears came to reality when the stranger commented about his eyes.  
  
"Your eyes"  
  
He said probably without even meaning to.  
  
"Umm yeah"  
  
"Wow"  
  
Cas' eyes widened at the response. This was not what he was expecting. His heart fluttered at the compliment.  
  
"Let me help you pick them up."  
  
The stranger said and started picking up books without waiting for him to reply. Cas just kept looking at him and having weird feelings for the first time in his life. After picking them all up, he handed them over to Cas with a smile. Cas took them, thanked him and then rushed towards his class.

Thankfully, the teacher has not come yet. Most of the students were already seated. He went to one at the back of the class. He preferred being invisible and was comfortable in that. His comfort was short lived when the stranger with whom he collided not long ago entered the class. Cas blushed looking at him and quickly looked down. He just wasn't ready to face him yet again. He came and sat in the row adjacent to Cas'. Just great!!! The teacher entered soon. She was quite young with blazing red hair and a kind face. She introduced herself as Anna Milton. She was the maths teacher. He found stranger's name during attendance. Dean Winchester.

The subject was easy for Cas but most of the time he found himself shyly looking at Dean. Thankfully, he never glanced back. The rest of the day was just same. He shared every single class with him. This year was not going to be easy.

During lunch he was sitting alone when a boy joined him.  
  
"Hey there! You new?"  
  
The boy with blonde hair and British accent asked him. He seemed kind.  
  
"Yeah. My family recently moved here. I am Castiel."  
  
"Balthazar. Nice to meet you. May I join you?"  
  
"Yeah. Sure."  
  
He ate the lunch with him. Balthazar was quite chatty and that made up for him. He was from France and had moved here few years ago. He was friendly and Cas was happy to have made a friend.

When the classes were finally over he felt relieved. The first day was over. Rest of them could not be worse right? Except he was having a hard time concentrating on the studies for the first time. His thoughts kept returning to the incident again and again. He reached home which was empty as expected. Made himself some sandwiches and completed his homework.

He helped Gabriel in preparing dinner. Michael had long hours of work and Lucius rarely came home so mostly they were the ones who cooked. The dinner was as usual.  
  
"So Castiel. How was your day at school?" Michael asked.  
  
"It was good. I made a friend. The teachers seemed nice."  
  
"Hmn. What about you Gabriel?"  
  
"It was okay. There was this really nice chick in my class. I tried to get her number but she refused. So! My single minded focus will be on her now." Gabriel said cheerfully.  
  
Michael shook his head. Rest of the dinner was mostly quiet except some small talks. It was Gabriel's turn to do the dishes so he pouted and tried to bribe Cas with candies. Cas rolled his eyes and left him in the kitchen with dishes. "You're gonna pay for this Cassey." Gabriel yelled after him but he just chuckled. He went to his bed, took out his diary and started the entry for today.

**Hi Dave. I know this has been long but I was busy because of the shifting. I missed talking to you. So anyways.**

**Today was my first day day at school. I was late for it and I ran into one guy. His name is Dean. My books were scattered everywhere and it was embarrassing. He was very good looking. He had iridescent green eyes. What am I talking??? Seriously Dave! During the entire day I kept thinking about him. I share each and every single class with him! I don't know what I am feeling now because I never felt something like that before. I wish there was a book on this. There are things I daren't confess to myself but I have to be honest with you. I kept looking at him the entire day! Thankfully he never looked back otherwise he would have thought I was being creepy. I'll stop talking about him right now. Huh. Gabe threatened me again for not doing the dishes. I wonder he will ever grow up? I don't think I want him to. Thats it for today. See you later Dave. I'm gonna sleep now. I don't want to be late tomorrow again and running into him again. I'm talking about him again! I'll stop now. God help me!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to make them longer. Hopefully. :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Umm, high school and domestic stuff? It is unbeta'd and all mistakes are mine. Hope you enjoy.

After waking up the next morning, Cas did his morning duties, brushed and showered. He never had his breakfast or coffee without having brushed his teeth. Breakfast with morning breath? Nope, he couldn't do that.

Gabe and Michael were probably still asleep. He went to the living room and found Lucius sprawled across the couch with a guy lying above him, resting his head on Lucius' chest and asleep. Lucius however, was awake.

"Hey Castiel."

"Hey Luc. When did you come home?"

"Hmn. Last night around 2 I guess."

Castiel nodded and went to kitchen.

"I'm making coffee. You want some?"

He yelled from the kitchen.

"Yeah that would be great. Thanks."

He made two cups of coffee and went back. Gabe was awake now. Not completely though. He was yawning and rubbing his eyes before coming into the living room. Michael's ooffice hours were kind of late so he was probably still asleep.

"Heya Luci. You're home."

"Umhmm. Seems like it."

Gabe yawned and went to bathroom. Cas was still drinking coffee with Luc. They chatted idly. Gabe emerged after sometime and went to kitchen to prepare breakfast. Cas helped him. They made scrambled eggs and bacon. Cas stuffed some into his lunchbox. He was not fond of school food.

Michael was awake now and so was the guy sleeping on Luc. He left quickly while Luc stayed for breakfast. As soon as they finished their breakfast Cas and Gabe left for school. Yesterday Cas was late so Gabe left without him. As soon as they entered the school, they went their seprate ways.

He was not late today and had no need to rush. He went to his classroom and sat on the same spot as yesterday. Soon Dean came with his friends as well. He became aware of his name during the attendance yesterday. Not surprisingly, Dean sat at the same spot as well. He was looking at Dean when he turned in his direction and gave him a smile. He blushed at that and quickly looked downwards. This was so frustrating. Why was he having so much effect on him? Cas groaned inwardly.

Soon Miss Milton came. During the class, she asked questions. He was the only one to raise his hand. She nodded at him and he answered the question correctly. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dean looking at him. It took all his will-power to not look at that direction and lock his eyes with him. Miss Milton smiled at him, applauded him, and then went on with her class. He glanced at Dean few times but made sure he was not noticed.

He ate lunch with Balthazar. He was quite a social butterfly and knew almost all of the students. He made Castiel meet some of his friends. Hannah, Rachel, ans Samandriel. They seemed polite. But mainly Cas spent his time with Balthazar. Rest of the day went smoothly. Except him stealing quick glances and sighing inwardly.

When he reached home, surprisingly Luc was still there. Gabriel was about to come soon but the same can not be said for Michael.

"How was your day?"

"It was good. Made some more friends today."

"If any of them bug you, let me know! I'll take care of it."

Cas grinned at that. They were all very possesive of him.

"I'm not a kid. I can take care of myself you know."

"Hmm. You're always gonna be the baby of the house Castiel."

"Yeah! Lucky me."

♥♡♥♡♥

They ate dinner and Cas did the dishes. After that he completed his homework. Then he started entry for the day.

**Hey there Dave. Today was pleasently normal. I walked to school with Gabriel. He was talking the entire time! Cassie this, Cassie that! Sometimes he is too much for my ears. Thankfully I was not late for school today. (^.^)**

****As for Dean, he looked at me and smiled during the beginning of our first class. My cheeks heated at that small thing! What in the heaven is he? I quickly glanced downwards while blushing. Without replying to his smile. It might have looked a bit rude from his perspective. But that was not my intention! I was too stunned to do anything.** **

******Anyways. I correctly answered all the questions in my Math class. He was looking at me while I answered them. I guess others were as well, but I didn't pay attention to anyone except him. I just couldn't. You must know that it was very difficult not looking at his direction while he looked at me. What is happening to me Dave? I just can't stop thinking about him. I wish you could answer. I'll go to sleep now. Night Dave.** ** **


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Un-beta'd. All grammatical mistakes and typos are mine.

Days went on like that. His crush on Dean kept increasing and increasing until it became something more. Something he never understood untill it happened to him. He was in love. Surprisingly, it didn't shock him when he realised that but he never thought he would fall for someone that hard and fast. That too for someone who didn't love him back.

He knew all of Dean's habits by now. How was he in all of the subjects? What classes he sometimes bunked? What games & sports he liked? His clothes, his shoes, his hair, his eyes, his freckles, everything. He smiled automatically when saw Dean smiling. Dean was what he looked forward to when he woke up in the morning. Dean was the one that filled his most of his journal entries now. Days when he couldn't see Dean at school were the worst. His mood would be sour the entire day. And he would be grumpy when he came home. Dean was kind of controlling his life now.

Sometimes, he found Dean looking at him. Very, very few times in comparison to the number of times he looked at Dean. But Dean didn't need to know that. Cas would always blush when he found Dean looking at him and would quickly avert his gaze elsewhere. He was not yet used to locking eyes with him. It did things to him.

Sometimes he saw Dean outside of school. At supermarkets, parks, and even burger-joints. Dean was always with his little brother. He had slightly long brown hair and hazel eyes. He kind of reminded him of Dean. Sometimes they were accompanied by their father and the other times by their father as well as their mother. Dean mostly got his looks from his father. His father had dark brown hair, high cheek-bones, well-defined jawline, and thick dark lashes. While their mother had blonde hair and a kind face. Dean's hair were kind of in between them. Somewhere between dirty blonde and light brown. They looked like a perfect family and it reminded Cas of his own. He missed his parents. His brothers took good care of him but some people just can't be replaced.

Three years passed like this. Cas had Masters in "long distance adoration" now. Only Balthazar knew about this. He always tried to talk Cas into confessing this to Dean and even threatened to expose him sometimes, but Cas kept stalling. Dean was typical jock that dated most popular "girls". Which Cas was not! He didn't want to make fun of himself in front of Dean. Who knew how he might react? What if he started hating him for it? Thoughts like these always stalled the confession. He was happy looking at Dean everyday. Watching him smile. Watching him throw his head back and laugh. Watching him plan pranks. Watching that "loving big brother" side of him outside of school when Dean was with his brother. Watching that obedient son he seemed when he was with his father. It was more than Cas ever asked for. He loved Dean, whether he was loved back or not.

He was coming home from school one day when it started raining. He was quickly drenched. He didn't have any rain-coat or umbrella with him, so he decided to wait in front of a diner. Thankfully the construction of diner made it possible to stand outside without getting wet. He was standing there waiting for the rain to stop when he saw familiar head of brown hair running towards him. Dean.

Dean was completely soaked when he came in and stood beside Cas. He was frowning and trying to get water off his hair. Cas stood there, silently watching. When Dean finally looked up to him, his expressions softened and he smiled.

"Hey Cas! How you doing?"

Cas. That was new. Nobody called him Cas. Gabriel teased him by calling Cassie sometimes but not Cas. He was even shocked to know that Dean Winchester knew his name!

"Hello Dean. I would've been better if it wasn't raining now." Castiel sighed.

Dean chuckled. "Yeah! Me too. Anyways, how are you?"

Castiel stared at him for a while and replied

"It's been a long time since someone asked me that."

Dean looked at him with a concerned face but remained silent.

"But I am good." Castiel continued with a smile on his face.

"So, how are you?"

"I'm awesome although kind of wet now. Heh."

Cas chuckled at that. They stood there, both of them completely wet, clothes clinging, small droplets of rain hitting their face. Maybe, it wasn't a bad thing it rained today.

Cas usually had trouble talking to new people but Dean was very easy to talk to. They just started talking but he already was comfortable with Dean. Also, he was blushing madly every now and then. This was Dean! The guy he had crushed and pined for years. That guy was talking to him, laughing at his lame sarcasm, making him feel that he was not that bad at social interactions as he thought, he was well capable of having hours of conversation too even though he never had them. It felt nice.

Currently, they were both quiet and staring into the rain. It was mesmerizing. Cas was still staring at the drops when Dean gently grabs his jaw, turns his head and kisses him. Cas' eyes widen in shock and he stands there for a few moments doing nothing. When he relaxes after the intial shock, he closes his eyes and starts reciprocrating.

Cold, wet lips against his slightly warmer ones.  
He has no idea what to do. So he tries to mimic what Dean does. Soon Dean's tongue is tracing his lips asking silent persmission for entrance. He opens his mouth to Dean's invading tongue and moans into the kiss. Dean's tongue is exploring every inch of his mouth. He gasps when Dean touches the roof of his mouth. He continues ravaging Cas' mouth for what seems like forever. When they finally part, Cas' heart is beating faster than ever. When he looks at Dean, he looks as dazed as him. Lips parted, pupils dilated, and heart trying to beat its way out of the heart. They gaze at each other for some time. Then Dean snaps out of it. His expression is panicked and shocked.

"I I... I gotta go." He runs through the rains, never turning back leaving Cas staring after him. Fingers still on his lips. A sweet reminder of that kiss. His first kiss.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of the kiss. >.>

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading and all the kudos and comments! ♥

Cas was standing there for a long time, staring at the direction where Dean ran. He was still tingling from the kiss. He did not even notice when it stopped raining. When he came to his senses, he started walking towards his house. His lips occasionaly lifted in smile, thinking about that kiss. No one was there yet. Michael came late and Gabe was at his cafe. After finishing his school, Gabe took a full time job in a nearby burger joint. The pay was decent and hours didn't suck either. Michael and Lucius were just the same.

Castiel changed into dry and comfy clothes and started his daily entry earlier. He was very anxious. Smile seemed to be plastered to his face today. He was tracing his lips with his fingers. This was too much. 

**Dave! You won't believe what happened today! I was walking home from school when it started raining. It was raining heavily and I didn't have an umbrella. A few minutes later Dean came running towards me, for shelter. It was hard to believe he was so near after all these years. And guess what? He talked to me! He was very friendly well-behaved. We talked for a while. Then he cuppeed my face and kissed me! I cannot write down in words how great it was. It was WOW. It was perfect and sweet and I never wanted it to end. I never knew I could feel like that. He is wonderful Dave. God I love him even more now. I can't help but want that again. I wanna kiss him again. Shit! Gabe's here. Gotta go. Will come back later.**  
  
He closed his diary, put it back and went outside. His mood was elevated for rest of the day. Dinner was usual. Gabriel gave him a scrutinizing look even though he didn't comment anything but others didn't seem to notice. He couldn't wait to go to school.  
  
♥♡♥♡♥  
  
He woke up earlier the next day. He was, probably for the first time in forever, super excited to go to school. Despite that he was also very nervous about it. He had never been in a relation. He had no idea how things were supposed to progress from there. Was he supposed to talk to Dean? Or was he supposed to wait for Dean to come to him? He wish he had a book that answered these questions. Lost in his thoughts he reached school. His eyes were searching for Dean.  
  
He did manage to manage to find Dean but the reaction was not what he expected. When he looked at Dean with a small smile, he got nervous and fled from there. Literally fled from there. Cas stood there awhile processing what happened. Dean was avoiding him. This was not what he had hoped for. Its crazy how the day he was so happy about turned into one of the worst days of his life. He felt like crying. The only person he had loved didn't want him back. He slowly made his way to his class. He did notice when Dean came in and sat in his usual place. But was carefully avoiding looking at his direction. Cas steeled his mind. If he cannot control his feelings he will atleast try to control his eyes. He will not be staring at Dean like he used to. He will atleast try.  
  
He passed the day without paying attention to what they were teaching. He did catch Dean looking at him few times tough. Everytime he gave the same "deer caught in headlights" expression. Cas only narrowed his eyes at that.  
  
Rest of the week passed like that. Dean would either try to run away from him or would be caught looking at him. Cas felt like he should demand an answer for that. Dean owed him that after that kiss. But the fear of rejection stopped him from doing that. He cried a few times during night time. He was glad sleep took over during those times. But he didn't let any of it show on his face during day time. He didn't want to be weak.  
  
Weekends were kind of uneventful. He watched TeenWolf with Gabriel. He groaned while he got up on monday. He had to go to school and face his eternal tormentor called "Dean Winchester". He slowly made his way to the school. Just outside the school buiding Dean was standing, hand in his pocket. He was searching the faces untill his eyes settled on Cas. And stayed there. It was weird. Something like that had never happened. He made his way over to building while maintaining eye-contact. As soon as they were near, Dean grabbed his hand and said- "We need to talk!".


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beginning of their relationship. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and leaving kudos and comments. I'm still without a beta so you have to endure the immaturish writing along with typos, spelling and grammatical errors. :P

"We need to talk!" That was all Cas heard before Dean basically dragged him out of there. He took him to a solitary part of playground. They were both breathing faster than normal by the time he stopped. Then he cupped Cas' face and kissed him again. Cas tensed for a second before kissing back. He knew he was supposed to push Dean away and demand answers from him but God! He needed this. He grabbed the back of Dean's head but his hair were too short to tangle his fingers there.

The kiss was nothing like their first one. This was rough, urgent and hungry. Cas whimpered when Dean's tongue entered his mouth and ravished him. It continued for some time. Cas totally lost track of that while they were kissing. Dean's already pouty lips were swollen and red. His pupils were dilated. Black almost swallowing the beautiful green of his eyes. They were both panting heavily. They looked into each others' eyes before Dean broke the silence.

"I'm sorry."

Cas didn't reply to that. So Dean continued after a moment.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted. You didn't deserve that. But you gotta understand, I got scared. I've never had these feelings for anyone! Not even the girls I went out with. Please forgive me!"

Cas nodded at that.

"I'm willing to forgive you for that. But I want to know where we stand. You cannot keep doing this." Cas stated plainly.

"I won't do it again! And I do want to ask you out. If you are still interested." Dean looked at him hopefully.

Cas had a small smile on his face after listening to that. He only managed to nod at that before Dean's face broke into a smile and he pulled him again for a kiss. This was chaste, short and sweet. Completely opposite to the one they shared.

"Come on Cas! Or we're gonna be late for class!"

They both hurried to their class. Thankfully they were only a few minutes late. But what had happened was worth it.

♥♡♥♡♥

The entire day, Cas couldn't care what they teaching. Periods passed by and he barely noticed. They kept looking at each other and directing sweet, shy smiles to each other. Cas had NEVER blushed that much in his entire life. He blushed even more when Dean kept winking at him which was followed by his mischevious smiles. It was..... Surreal. Cas didn't want this day to end. Ever!

That day, he ate his lunch with Dean. Balthazar, when spotted them, gave him a huge smile and thumbs-up before going back to wherever he came from. They shared their lunch and talked. A lot! Dean was very chatty. He talked about his family. His mom, dad and especially about his younger brother Sam. It was very evident how much he liked his brother. He asked a lot of questions too. About his family, his hobbies, his taste in music and movies. He was a very attentive listener. Cas was very pleased to know that Dean loved "Sherlock" as much as he did. Although their taste in music was not same. Dean was classic rock fan while he preffered R&B. They exchanged their numbers before going back to classes.

Rest of the day was just the same. Cas couldn't stop smiling. They chatted for awhile before going back their seprate ways. As much as he wanted to kiss Dean, he was not very comfortable about doing it in public, yet. And he was very sure Dean felt the same way. He smiled all the way to the home.


End file.
